What’s one step you can take forward to see what work is required?
Right. And have you done that?
I have and that’s what scares me. It seems so huge. Mountain like.
Break it down. Again. Smaller. Again. So what would that look like now?
Writing a list, so I can check it off. Good. Top of that list is what?
Behaviours that aren’t ideal. What’s mine to change. What am I responsible to change. This is good, right!
So the next list should be about each of those steps. What are the behaviours that need updating.
Rigid to less rigid.
Negative to less negative.
My way to a way that is about more than just me. That there is more than one way to solve a situation. Others views, input, experiences, needs, are just as important as mine.
But, I feel like I’m not being fulfilled or appreciated. This makes me anxious. Makes me feel out of control. Like I’m never getting my needs met.
The fact is your needs are getting met just not how you would do it. The outcome will be effective. Viewpoints and perspectives should be updated frequently to show us where we grow. So you have a point in time that is then and now. You will be fulfilled if you allow this new perspective or way of doing “Into your soul”.
When you are so conditioned to a way, it can bring up feelings we would rather not feel. The fact is that this needs to shift.
The journey to changing your style of rigid behaviour is small steps. Consistently. Be negotiable to your viewpoint, don’t shut it down.
Be kinder to how things play out. Be available to learning. Be available to your heart space. Be available to your inner child. Your inner child is playful. Relaxed. Trusting. Not traumatised and conditioned to the way it has been up to this point. Your inner child wants freedom from thoughts that make you feel negative. Your inner child is screaming at you and you shut them down.
Trust your inner child. Your internal north compass. The guide. The navigator. Don’t be a victim to your conditioned state of hypersensitivity and hypervigilance that was activated through trauma. We are not our trauma.
Ok, so what you’re saying is: I have to accept that there is a place I will get to on the other side of how I feel right now. That I’m not always going to feel uncomfortable and nervous of the unknown that making change brings. Exactly! It’s a new YOU. YOU!
It’s still not that simple. And I never said it would be. You have to just flow. Open the door and let some air in.
How do you feel now? Having let some air in? BETTER.
So when you make a change. The light will enter. The shoulders will fall. The pressure you put yourself under will lift.
I know. But, do I have to really grow? Isn’t that changing me?
No, it’s about being open. Right now, you feel that there is nothing beyond where you are right now.
Open yourself up. Be honest. There is always a way.
You just need to decide what’s the purpose. Follow your soul and your heart. Because real change is possible. Real change has the power to change the direction of your life. Pure and Simple.
On the other side of change is less stress, more confidence, being heard, and appreciation.
Like everything in life. The ball is in your court. But don’t sit in the doorway expecting not to get hit when it closes because you can’t make a decision. Maybe the decision is – that right there – what side of the door will you be on when it closes?
Are you a lists person, does the above suggestions of how to break change down to small bite size pieces help you to navigate change effectively?
Would love to know if this resonates with you. Let me know by either commenting below or sending me a message. Whichever is most comfortable for you.